creation

this morning i was thoroughly enjoying the warm sun on my face and the cool breeze on my way to class. the air was so crisp and clean, it felt so dense and pure as i drew in each breath. what a gift! i love days like today. what is it about beautiful days that completely enthralls me, that makes me so happy? i love being outside on days like these. i love being a part of God's creation. not just observing it, but being it.

i like to think about the wind and how it's a picture of God's spirit, how he put the breath of life into us and how we became living souls. i like to imagine the wind as the spirit of God, constantly moving, always there. breathing in that air reminds me of breathing in God's spirit, which is what constantly sustains me and keeps me alive. i think there's more to be said about our connection to nature than most people have said. or maybe i don't read enough. either way, i was thinking this morning about the times when i don't enjoy creation: breathing in polluted air or smog from cars, swimming in dirty water, seeing fields or trails or forests covered with trash.

and i had this thought.

what happened to creation (nature) when sin entered this world and satan roamed the earth? was he only focused on destroying humans? or was he after more? obviously i don't think satan chops down trees or pollutes our waters, but did he use us to destroy parts of the world for him? the parts God deemed "good?" are there other things besides the fruit that we have taken and consumed (eaten) because we saw it was good for ________ (whatever our motives were)?

now i'm not your typical environmentalist, but what would it look like if the world became entirely polluted, without clean rivers and oceans, without forests of huge trees that sustain so much life? what if there were no more nature preserves, no areas that remain as they were created? how would that shape our understanding of Jesus as the vine and us as the branches? what would bearing fruit mean? would the offer for all who are thirsty to freely come and drink from the river of life be as enticing?

until this morning, i don't know if i've ever been so appreciative of the areas that we have protected in their natural state. i used to make fun of them, but i'm so glad that there are people seeking to care for the earth.

i've been having a longing to go be in the wilderness lately. i want to go hiking. maybe camp. want to go?

three followers

today i learned that i have three followers.  of my blog.

and although i'm happy about this, it seriously CREEPS me out.

why are they following me all of a sudden?  how long have they been following?

what did these people have to do to become followers?

i'm pretty sure i never laid out any ground rules for following my blog...

GROUND RULES FOR FOLLOWING MY BLOG:

1.  don't be a creeper.  please.

2.  don't be a hater.

ok, feel free to join now.  i eagerly await the masses.

reluctant...reluctance?

i just realized that i can write anything on this blog.  yes, obviously.  but what may not be so obvious is that i have a tendency to wait to unveil parts of myself, or wait until i have everything figured out (a plan), and then announce it to the world. which, ironically enough, is the exact opposite of what i want this blog to be about. which, ironically enough, is the reason why i have been waiting to post something. so what if i don't have everything figured out?

here's to overcoming my reluctance for action.  wow, this is harder than i thought.

reluctant defiance

it is the enigma of wanting to change the world without changing yourself.

it is the reason for all those mountaintops and valleys.

or ditches. or holes. or, more appropriately,

v o i d s .

not a location,

not just a state of mind, but a state of heart. an emptiness

what happened?

i think, helplessly compassionate,

you felt the need for change. you needed change to come.

but you could not change yourself.

or what is that, rather impersonally,

you saw the need for change? you wanted change to come?

but you would not change yourself?

you think you want to defy the status quo.

but you don't.

you're unsure. you're unwilling. why?

true defiance acknowledges that you are part of the problem.

the status quo.

and now you want out.

but to get out you must change.

to be out, you must be different.

not just a change of mind, but a change of heart.

how easy it is to change your mind and not your heart!

defiance is hard. but it is romantic. and full of heartbreak.

you must learn to let go the things you love.

like yourself.

this is me.

overcoming my reluctant defiance.